Fuck invitations

I really don't like handles on mugs. I think handles are meant to be inviting. I think that's why they have them. Mugs that is. Screw invitation. I don't need an invitation to warm my hands. My hands are cold and I want to fully cradle that hot mug. One hand is always fighting with the handle. Sure I could turn the handle away, but then you get the "third wheel" situation, and nobody likes a third wheel. Plus when I use a handle my pinky always comes up showing how pretentious I am. Got to keep that shit under wraps.

(This came shortly after I broke the handle off my favorite mug)

Having a bad day?

Well this little dude just wrecked the shit out of that plan...

Watership down

Lots of rabbits out last night. Shared footprints in the first snow fall. Whimsical is all that comes to mind, both in physical description and feeling.

Today was top notch. Spent the morning trapped in my house with a french press and hundreds of vinyl records. The snow prevented me from driving to work, which was fine by me.

For lunch I steamed the largest golden beet I have ever seen. I was a bit disappointed to see it go, but that passed as soon as I ate it. I love beets. Especially sour beets. Love. Furthermore makes a Belgian beer out of fermented golden beets: Thermal Reefer. Top notch.

After lunch I went to Eyeopia to look at glasses. Eyeopia is this tiny local glasses boutique a few blocks away. So I laced up the boots and trudged out. Most amazing glasses experience I've ever had. They sit you down and pick out 20 or so glasses that they like on you while you drink hot cider. Then you look at what they picked out in the mirror and narrow it down. They even get other customers involved. Once you narrow it down, you can get your picture taken with the glasses on. They won't let you buy anything that day, though. You have to think about it for a week or so. Brilliant.

Came home and did two hours of yoga in an empty apartment. Perfect. Been doing a lot of yoga lately. It's really helped to clear my mind and has increased my flexibility tremendously. I've been far less achy in the mornings and have a lot more energy too. Then I ate a bunch of Kale with a bit of sea salt and washed it down with a hearty glass of kombucha (and a shot of bourbon). Add to that the Imperial stout I just had and things are shaping up to be a perfect evening.

Shaving

I moved the Battle of Antietam into 2nd place for bloodiest single-day battle fought on American soil after shaving this morning. Fuck I hate shaving.

December 1st

So here it is, December.
Haven't talked to her in over a month.
She said this would be the soonest she'd talk to me, December.
Kinda weird not talking to someone,
Someone you spent close quarters with for two years.

I'm not going to call her.
Made some bread tonight,
I think tonight was a fine night.
Here's to the rest of December.

North

So tomorrow I head home for Thanksgiving. I'm more excited to see my parents more than anything. I've never really got behind the gluttony of Thanksgiving, at least in the eating sense. I'll probably do Yoga, read, and hang with ma and pop.
Taking a step back, I was particularly excited to go to work today. Not so much because of the mysteries of science that await me but the food that I was bringing in for co-workers. Lately I've been cultivating my sourdough starter, Lucinda. Yes, her name is Lucinda. I figure anything I have to feed twice a day deserves at least a name. She's about 2 months old and I think she's really hitting her stride. Plus I've been trying a bunch of new bread baking techniques combined with my own experimentation.
So I wake up at 4:45am like a kid eager to open his presents, setting the oven to 500ºF to bake the two loaves I've been proofing the last two days. All in all, I think the loaves turned out pretty well. I still think there is a bunch that I can improve on, which is a good problem for me to have. My co-workers on the other hand ate that shit up. Loved it. It is a good feeling to have something you worked really hard on appreciated that much. A much needed feeling.
I also brought in a growler of the latest batch of kombucha I made. That did not go over as well, mostly because people were afraid that they would get "sick", despite my assurance that they would be fine. But some people did try it and really enjoyed it. Some even wanted some SCOBY to start brewing it themselves. Again, another warm swell of pride.
I'm sure my co-workers think I'm a nut for bringing in all this fermented food, but honestly, it's all science to me.

Role Reversal

As I write this entry, I'm alone in my apartment. Been that way most of the day. I got a lot accomplished today: bottled my week old kombucha and started 3 more gallons, tried some new sourdough techniques, did yoga in addition to my normal workout. I feel satisfied. Still alone though. Weird. It hasn't been like this in almost two (2) years. Typically, I'd be the one not at home while my roommates were huddled in their respective domicile enclaves. Not today, not tonight. Both are at the homes of respective friends. Granted, I suppose I could be doing the same thing, but I feel I should stay in this moment. To embrace it; to fully take in how quickly life changes and the absolute uncertainty of it all. And that is the silver lining, anything is possible. Been at this game for nearly 28 years now and I can safely say it is still the best fucking game in town. So I'm just going to sit and take it in. Alone.

P90X

A group of co-workers and I started the P90X routine this last week. Now, I'm sure the primary reason that they wanted to do it was to get into shape. However, I consider myself to be in decent shape so I wasn't sure why exactly I was cajoled into joining the group, particularly when there were plenty of others that wanted in, and space was limited. Huh.
At any rate, I guess MY primary motive for joining the group was to try something different (novelty) as well as having the camaraderie. I had only heard of P90X and wasn't exactly familiar with it. So I did a bit of research and watched a few videos. Basically, aside for Tony Horton being an absolute douche nozzle, I think the program is great from the perspective of helping the average joe, who lacks direction and motivation, to get into shape. It clearly lays out a work out routine and provides detailed instructions on how to perform all the exercises. Now, Tony isn't exactly reinventing the wheel. He just slaps dumbass names onto well established exercises and arranges them into an easy to follow program. I will admit though, the routines are pretty intense and I enjoy the challenge. The abs ripper program (affectionately renamed the ass ripper) is particularly challenging. I'm using this to supplement my current workout regimen and so far have really been enjoying it. All in all, I think this will be a good experiment.

On a lighter, stupider note, we are in discussions concerning a porn version of the program aptly titled P69XXX. We've hit some snags in storyboarding, but I think the stakeholders are on board with the project. The adopted core mantra/philosophy of P69XXX is centered on the "3 Gets": 1. Get money 2. Get fit 3. Get off.

Current listen, fucking love Polish heavy metal:

Rowing on three fingers of Rowan's Creek Bourbon...make that six fingers

The Future

Pictorially


















Musically

Color me antiquated

I ran into an "acquaintance" the other day on a leisurely stroll downtown. It appeared obvious that a chat would ensue so I reached into my pocket to stop my walkman cassette player. Somehow incapable of properly turning it off, I removed it from my pocket to get a better estimation to the problem and my obvious stupidity. Upon seeing the walkman, ACQ gave a mocking chuckle. "What?" assuming the laugh was directed at my obvious defect with electronics.
"What the fuck is that?".
"Umm, a tape player."
"You still have one of those?"
"Actually, I have about 8 in various stages of decay. Not sure why, should probably just toss the broken ones away."

Basically the conversation steered into the realm of me not owning an Ipod and the ridiculousness of listening to music on tapes. Ok, let's evaluate. I've had a Walkman since I could remember. The first tape I bought was Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" or maybe it was Meatloaf's "Bat Out of Hell", not important since both are classic. My tape collection has slowly grown from there. Clearly, I dabbled in latest raging media formats such as CDs and mp3s, but have since returned to tapes and records as my primary source of music.
At any rate, tapes are cheap as shit, cheaper than mp3's (unless you download of course) and they sound, well, more nostalgic, I hesitate to say better. Honestly, it really boils down to the quality of analog or digital system to accurately evaluate sound quality. And, well, a Walkman is not a high end sound system. So the argument on quality is pretty moot and probably in favor of the Ipod. My argument stayed in the pasture of personal preference. At its most basic, there is just something about that analog hiss that is really fucking religious to me. Plus a tape is tangible, a mp3, not so much.
Additionally, Walkman's are super cheap, 2 bones at your local thrift shop.
Making mixtapes is cathartic and the extra labor involved enhances the quality of the product. Making a tape is real-time dude, not point and click and you have a mixed "tape" CDr. Please don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with digital media, I imbibe lots of it. But when it comes down to it, I'll choose my Walkman over the Ipod. Mostly because I'm so fvkking kvlt.

E.

A Not So Good Night in the San Pedro of the World

it's unlikely that a decent poem is in me
tonight
and I understand that this is strictly my
problem
and of no interest to you
that I sit here listening to a man playing
a piano on the radio
and it's bad piano, both the playing and
the composition
and again, this is of no interest to you
as one of my cats,
a beautiful white with strange markings,
sleeps in the bathroom.

I have no idea of what would be of
interest to you
but I doubt that you would be of
interest to me, so don't get
superior.
in fact come to think of it, you can
kiss my ass.

I continue to listen to the piano.
this will not be a memorable night in my
life
or yours.

let us celebrate the stupidity of our
endurance.
CHARLES BUKOWSKI

Particularly pertinent this evening

I'll take mine with a bunch of slim...

Lately I've been all about brewing kombucha. While I enjoy kombucha a lot, I definitely separate myself from the kombucha fanatics, of which there are PLENTY. You know, the ones that claim drinking kombucha cures cancer, which is right up there with prayer cures diabetes. Anyway, I like it, but I like making it more. Not quite sure why. Maybe because I'm going through a mother hen phase and need something to coddle and incubate at a temperature roughly between 75-80ºF for 7-8 days. At any rate, I raise a delicious brood. I've got 3 more gallons going and 1.5 to go through. Shit, just being near me might cure your cancer...

fondre (to melt) in the past participle fondu (melted)

So we are going to skip ahead to Thurs evening (Nov. 11). Wed and Thurs were mostly filled with driving and business dribble. Granted, I spent most of the time in the most white, sterile room that I've ever been in; completely encased in a hooded jumpsuit and booties. Another time...
Thurs Night! Fondue Night! Now, let it be known, I've lived in WI all my life and readily admit I have never been the state's greatest consumer of cheese. In fact, it has only been recently since I've tried my hand at making cheese that I have been consuming cheese. At any rate, cheese is fucking delicious.
I was pretty pumped to have fondue, particularly in Swissland, the arguable origin of this fondre dish. Secondly, a co-worker, who had been in Swissland for the last two months was going to be present. In fact, he invited me, as it was a going away fondue dinner for him. We were acquaintances at best, but having been immersed in Swiss German the last three days, I considered him to be my best English speaking friend.
The fondue was amazing. I mean, it blew my mind. I made sure to sit next to the Swiss DBA (database administrator) from Roche. He looked like he clearly knew what was up (in this case I used age as my experience metric, 55 years old and clearly Swiss raised) and very graciously led me through this first fondue experience. Granted, eating fondue is not rocket science, you dip a piece of bread in melted cheese. I mean, it could stop there and still be amazing. But what I was after was those Swiss nuances, those little things that I wouldn't get going to the Melting Pot on the West side of Madison. No 1.: They brought out a Swiss Brandy called Kirsch, neat of course.
I was instructed that I should first dip the bread in the Kirsch and then into the fondue, followed by more Kirsch to wash it down. If I wasn't driving, this ritual would have been repeated several more times, several more times, several... No. 2 As the fondue started to dwindle, my mentor told the waiter to bring an egg. He cracked the egg into the remaining fondue and stirred it around until the egg and cheese caramelized onto the bottom of the pot. I was then encouraged to scrape the caramelized cheese from the base of the pot and enjoy. Oh did I enjoy. The closest comparison, in my very limited cheese consumption knowledge, would start with the caramelized cheese on the crust of a Chicago style pizza combined with the texture of a Host (aka the Body of Christ, trully or symbolized) at a Christian mass except embodying the very essence of how delicious consuming something Divine would be.




If you do not own this album, you should. This is by far my favorite album of 2010:



“They play heavy metal the old way, the exact way we enjoy it ourselves.”
- Fenriz, Darkthrone

Yup, they do and it is awesome.

Currently reading: The Bread Maker's Apprentice

It's been a long fucking time...

A lot has changed since my last post a million years ago; changes that have prompted me to start this blogging venture over again with hopefully more vigor and tenacity.

I've gained and lost a lot in the last several months:

Gained:
New Zealand
Colorado
Northern Minnesota
Switzerland
Kombucha culture
Sourdough culture
Anxiety
Appreciation for raw foods

Lost:
Weight
My best friend
interest

As is evident, the gained list far outweighs the lost list, but don't be mislead by the disparity in numbers, those lost things are pretty hefty.

Last night, after traveling for what seemed two (2) days, I made it back to Madison. A return that still leaves my a bit vexed, but overall happy to be back.
I spent the last 5 days in Switzerland (Swissland from here on) on account of work. The whole trip made me extremely anxious mostly because of the extreme lack of communication between me and my Swiss counterparts. I had set up an itinerary for my visit weeks in advance only to receive confirmation the first day I arrived in Swissland. Bullshit. Yet all that anxiety melted away once I was able to get outside and start hiking.
I was staying in Luzern at the Radisson Blu. When I travel for work the hotels are always so nice/too nice. Everyone is walking around in their business attire and here I am with my skinny fit black jeans and a $2 vintage sweater. Granted, I don't look like shit, I just don't quite fit in. That brings me to the other elephant in the room. I don't speak a lick of German. Now, granted, most people in Swissland speak English, particularly the hotel staff, but I think this stresses me out the most. This stems primarily from that FACT that when a european comes to the US, we expect them to speak English. Now, contrarily, I go to Swissland and I expect them to speak English to me because I don't speak German. Makes me feel pretty shitty. Then I remember I'm a privelaged American, so fuck it, you'd better accomadate me. Ass.Hole.
It should be noted that if you want to submit to absolute solitude though, being in a foreign country definitely helps. I was in a few coffee shops/bars, revisiting the mighty work Siddartha by Herman Hesse in honor of being in Switzerland, and I couldn't help but feel even more alone. It is incredible for focusing. I get the best of both worlds. I get the surrounding white noise of people talking that I love without the usual distraction of eavesdropping because I can't understand a damn thing. And the coffee. Amazing. It isn't so much that coffee in Europe is better than in the USA, it's more that good coffee is more prevalent. You can go to the petro station and get the same quality coffee/espresso as a coffee shop. As a result, there were few moments in Swissland where I was without coffee. Hey, at least I was regular and jet lag stood no fucking chance.
Back to the good part, hiking. Luzern is situated on a lake shadowed by the mighty Swiss Alps. While I was unable to get to the mountains I was able to circumnavigate the lake and take in all that is Luzern. In addition, I got to walk on the Kapellbrücke:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kapellbr%C3%BCcke

Breakfast: Lox, amazing bread and muesli in a buffet arrangement. Seriously.

To be continued...

Before I suspend this post I'd like to share something relevant to one of my losses. Probably at one of my lowest points my father's simply and crassly worded, but sage advice, resonated very strongly with me while I was in Swissland: "Boy, there ain't but one motherfucker that's going to be with you until the end. You." I'm learning to be that motherfucker.

Love,
E.

2009 Floaters

Top 10 albums of 2009? Yikes. Never been all that great at making these lists. Not in so much that there is a lack of great albums but more so my inability to keep up. If asked to make a best of 2008, I'd probably be able to squeak by reasonably unscathed by the cool kids. So here's my "I found these albums first so fuck off" list, framed with pretention and attitude.

1. Black Pyramid- S/T
2. The Devil's Blood- The Time Of No Time Evermore
3. Metalucifer- Heavy Metal Bulldozer (english version)
4. Teitanblood- Seven Chalices
5. While Heaven Wept- Vast Oceans Lachrymose
6. Throneum- Deathcult Conspiracy
7. Lord Vicar- Fear no Pain
8. The Chasm - Farseeing the Paranormal Abyss
9. High Spirits -S/T
10. W.A.I.L.- S/T

These are subject to change as I find records I forgot I had but this is a decent synopsis of 2009.

Love,
E.

Fuckin' Thrash

I finally got my hands on the reissue of Morbid Saint's Spectrum of Death LP on No Colours records. Fuck. These boys hail(ed) from Sheboygan, WI and were, in my humble opinion, the most underrated thrash band ever. Spectrum of Death is the perfect combination of eviliness, grind and thrash of the late 80s. They take the pure hate of Razor, mix it with the darkness of early Sodom and play it all at a breakneck speed. This album will break your neck and rape your soul.




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGx_lkJsCZI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHulWnPnda8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgkXh9APYPI&feature=related

and so on

How I learned to stop worrying and learned to love the NWOBHM

NWOBHM always seemed a bit too close to glam for me. Being in diapers during its emergence, it kinda muttled together into the glam/hair cluster fuck that was the 80s. Plus I was too busy looking for the next obituary clone, and wouldn't be caught dead with a tape from a band that dressed in tight leather and feathered their hair. However, the last couple years, coupled with the magic of the internet, I realized that I was a dumb fucking kid. And that is how I learned to stop worrying....and love NWOBHM

Cloven Hoof
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgyAs0rFanI

Angelwitch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXZc9-mtFDk

Bleak House
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zowid7KAmnM

Witchfinder General
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXXxh1fq8sw&feature=related

Stormwitch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4p9-4YipkTc

Tokyo Blade
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaDwjZCCSno

The Hand of Doom
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZQNvQn0vbw

Etc...

A Virgin Birth

Ahh, the first post...

The purpose of starting this blog is to serve as an outlet for posting newly acquired records, music and playlists I've been digging, my radio show, all the funny shit people send me and the like. Plus it's what all the cool kids were doing about 5 years ago. Sink or swim.

Love
E.